The Difference Between Falling In Love When You Are Ready And When You Are Lonely

"Although I have fallen in love several times in my life, I have really only been in love once. Doesn’t seem to add up, does it? Well, I have only fallen in love one time, at a point in my life when I wasn’t especially lonely. It was when I was much younger and when, to be honest, I was doing just fine without a female companion to share my life with. That was the first time I truly fell in love – and now that I think about it, the last.

This happens to all of us who have had no choice but to give up on a first love. It’s a sad truth: Once you’ve fallen in love deeply, you yearn for that love; you wish to find it again. You become lonely. You begin to fantasize and create a reality that doesn’t actually exist. Then you fall in love with someone unworthy of it.

That first time you fell in love can’t entirely be described in words. It’s as if the emotions, the state of your being and your state of mind became a different entity entirely. You go from being you, to being this other person — this person who needs this other person to survive. It’s as if you were just introduced to an organ that you rely on for life, which you never before even realized existed.

“Soul mate” is an understatement; it’s as if you have found a part of your soul that you didn’t know you had. It’s all incredibly overwhelming, to say the least. It is by far the most amazing, most intoxicating, most horrible and excruciating feeling in the world. And the second we get that first taste of it, we become addicts for life.

Unfortunately, as most stories go, we are forced into a withdrawal. I would like to say that more often than not it’s our own fault, but it’s never actually that simple. It’s you. It’s him or her. It’s the timing. It’s the situation. It’s the mistakes you made. It’s the mistakes you weren’t willing to risk. The stars didn’t align at the right moment in place and time, and hence, the two of your hearts cracked — metaphorically, of course. Physically cracking you’d expect would be swifter and less painful.

So you go on living your life the best you can, never truly forgetting about that taste, that incredible aroma that filled your soul. We never forget those perfect moments we lived with the person we loved. Then we spend the rest of our lives looking for our next fix.

Loneliness is a strong motivator. It moves us to make — I’m sorry to say — some very, very poor decisions. I can tell you right now that I am very likely to make yet another poor decision in a few hours, in the hopes of maybe, just maybe getting lucky enough to meet someone who I’ll not regret seeing when I wake up in the morning. Although we may love every single other aspect of our lives, being human makes us need the companionship of other people. And if we were lucky or unlucky enough to get a taste of real love, we’re going to search for that next fix until we find it.

Which is how we fall in love without ever actually being in love. “Falling into infatuation” would be more fitting terminology, but not quite as poetic. We meet someone who is great, beautiful, fun, interesting enough. And thanks to our brains being able to imagine grandeur and provoke emotional responses, we can take that previous feeling of love and warp it to fit the new mold.

The funny thing is, we actually believe we are in love. We think about the person throughout the day with intense positive feelings. We imagine ourselves with this person for the long run. We feel a need to see him or her and to spend time together. Yet, more likely than not, we eventually realize we aren’t compatible; loneliness had us raise our hopes up very high.

Things only get trickier as you go through these episodes of loving and mock-loving. After a few runs, you begin to question each new relationship and begin to anticipate the falling out. Then, the question is, would it have worked had your mind been in the right place, or were you really not compatible to begin with? Are your standards unrealistic? Or are you actually selling yourself short and settling?

The truth is, you won’t know until you find the next person you truly fall in love with. At that moment, your perspective comes into focus and you clearly see that most, if not all, of your previous loves weren’t actually loves. Until that point, you are likely to try to revert and reach out to past failed lovers in hopes that you can rekindle the flame.

So, do you hold yourself back from loving until you’re sure it’s real? No. If it ends up being real, then you’ve made it. If not, then you surely had a good time for a good stretch, and because you now know you weren’t in love, moving on will be easy. Live and love as much as you can. Those will be the stories you tell when you’re old and wrinkled."

Day 0 (14 Feb)

Day 1 (15 Feb) - Seoul

Kimchi-making -> Hanbok-wearing -> Ice Cup-sculpting -> Trick Eye Museum -> Ice Museum -> Dongdaemun

 Master at work sculpted a perfect-looking cup within..... 5 minutes!!?

Ice Block (before)

#sodarnhard #noflair #30minutesnotenough #ineed3hours #icewouldhavemelted #SUA

 Ice Block (after) 

A unique enough wine cup HAHAHA ;)

 Wy's egg-shaped glass cup was so pretty TT I thought hers would have won top 3 lor

Kimchi-making -> Hanbok-wearing -> Ice Cup-sculpting -> Trick Eye Museum -> Ice Museum -> Dongdaemun

Mastered le art of levitation, ohmmmmm

Master Chen discovered that we peeked at his ancient scroll that contained the sacred formula of the art of levitation. He was furious! He decided to shrink and lock us up in a sand timer time capsule to reflect on our sins for ............. 100 years 5 minutes

Because the flash from the camera shattered the glass walls AND WE BROKE FREE!!!

MINDY & BRENDA ON THE RUN

and attempted to disguise themselves as Afros

*desperately needed to find a hiding place*

and I grew a pair of wings and hid amongst white clouds

 

Walking the red carpet for making it out alive (Y)

My favourite has gotta be this 

 WE MANAGED THE CLIMB UP THAT FREAKIN STEEP CLIFF!!!!!

Needed to use the bathroom and as soon as I closed the door, this was what I saw 

PAPARAZZI!!! leave gaga alone already
HAHAHA

Kimchi-making -> Hanbok-wearing -> Ice Cup-sculpting -> Trick Eye Museum -> Ice Museum -> Dongdaemun

Nothing much here, even with our winter suits on, we were freeeeezing omg 

 An ice book shelf and fireplace

 An ice piano

 An ice sink

An ice toilet bowl with a poop in it

An ice slide
There was a piece of styrofoam provided to sit on so our butts don't freeze to ice ahahahah

An ice popsicle

And an ice bar 

Favourite pic of the place :)

Kimchi-making -> Hanbok-wearing -> Ice Cup-sculpting -> Trick Eye Museum -> Ice Museum -> Dongdaemun

Usually if you're going on tours, they would drop you off at Doota. In Doota, everything is more expensive. Okay at least the things I saw were more expensive, like a pair of earrings could cost $10 but I can get the same pair in Beadstreet for $1?? Apparels there are more high-end which also means more ex. But if you have an abundant supply of cash, why not HAHAHA

Directions for a more affordable alternative:

 Facing Doota, turn left and walk straight, enter the next building ahead on your right

A mixture of winter-spring fashion. Something like Bugis but pricer. Take for example one piece of sweater shirt costs 10000 won in DDM, after converting to SGD it would be around $12, but you can get the same piece in Bugis at $10.

Now you might be starting to wonder if Bugis is the cheapest shopping paradise but no, Women's Street (Day 8) is even cheaper HOMAIGAWD the day when I have the least amount of cash left

 오빠랑ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

Day 2 (16 Feb) - Jeju

Breakfast was hearty! Happy morning! Best breakfast of the whole trip =)

At Jeju Grand Hotel

Waffles w whipped cream, bulgogi, potato w mustard, bacon, dumpling

Cakes x5, grapes, homemade yoghurt w blackcurrent raisins & cornflakes

Seawood porridge

Orange juice

AND STILL HUNGRY OMG

Submarine -> Orange-plucking -> Aqua Planet -> Seongsan Sunrise Peak -> Teddy Bear Museum -> Dragon Head Rock

Took a boat to an offshore island before hopping onto the submarine and submerging underwaterrrr! Meh, wasn't as fascinating as I thought it to be. Water was cloudy, fishes were normal-looking, I thought perhaps we could see some exotic fishes since we were going underwater but nehhh nothing of that sorts :( Snorkeling at Phuket/ Bali would be a better choice!

The jetty

Random ducklings seagulls spotted

On the submarine:

In the submarine:

 
 Screen on top left shows how it looks like from above the submarine while
counter at top right shows our depth (we were 10 metres deep atm!)

 just fishies passing by~

It's a.... It's a........... IT'S A......

scuba diver passing by~

Submarine -> Orange-plucking -> Aqua Planet -> Seongsan Sunrise Peak -> Teddy Bear Museum -> Dragon Head Rock

Came here last June (summer) and it wasn't the harvesting season so all they had were bogus orange ornaments hung up. But this time it's winter and they have real oranges OMG! 

Each allowed to pluck 2 and eat them! I think they are mandarin oranges?? Sweeeeet, literally hahah

Submarine -> Orange-plucking -> Aqua Planet -> Seongsan Sunrise Peak -> Teddy Bear Museum -> Dragon Head Rock

More interesting than the submarine HAHAHA

 Not a colourful pebble, it's a frog O_O

 STONEFISH COOLSTUFF

 Never too old for Nemo~ ^^ 

Preserved neon skeletal remains  

 Would be great models for watercolour paintings, if only I were good at it hahahaha

 

 Gill & Dory!!!

Lo and behold...... WILD POKEMON APPEARED!!!

And these jellyfishes are so adorbz I feel like squishing them HAHAHAHAHAH

Submarine -> Orange-plucking -> Aqua Planet -> Seongsan Sunrise Peak -> Teddy Bear Museum -> Dragon Head Rock

Went there last June too! Not much difference with the exception of the withered grass now. And the grass patches are cordoned off now >< Was secretly hoping the whole place would be covered with snow hahahaha, imagined an ice-caped mountain/ dormant volcano buttttt.... didn't happen.... 

STILL, a lovely place for a photoshoot!

 FAH-BOO-LAHS

 Submarine -> Orange-plucking -> Aqua Planet -> Seongsan Sunrise Peak -> Teddy Bear Museum -> Dragon Head Rock

So they had many life-sized bears with nice backdrops for photo-taking

But this time, I discovered a section which I never knew existed!!  THESEEE

 If there was a Singapore bear couple, I bet they would be clothed in t-shirt and shorts hahahaha

Wonder Girls Bears

 

Hi Apollo!

"The Starry Night Over The Rone" , original painting by Vincent van Gogh

THE DA VINCI CODE

Shrek & Fiona 

Gulliver's Travels

Just pretty snow~

And Mr..... Right?

Me: *blushes* OHMYGAWDDDDD *smiles*

Wy: *stuns* Harh?? .....omg.... Yeeees....  Yes omg yes!!! ....... Eh wait flower only ah where's my diamond ring?!   

Minz: HAHAHAHAH you think???? (yes)

Dada: NO~ | Mr Bear: Whyyyyy? Is this proposal not romantic enough? Would you like heart-shaped fireworks? I'll get it right this instant!! | Dada: YOU'RE A PLAYER! How many girls you wanna propose too?! 꺼져!!!

  
(fictitious story-line) 

 Submarine -> Orange-plucking -> Aqua Planet -> Seongsan Sunrise Peak -> Teddy Bear Museum -> Dragon Head Rock

Dragon Head Rock or Yongduam Rock (용두암) 

It was dark when we reached, not exactly the best time to visit/ take pictures. 

Anyways, not recommend for sightseeing imo. If not its name, it would never have thought of any resemblance to a dragon head :x

 Distant relatives maybe??? 

OH YES! Before this, we watched the NANTA show!

Story revolves around the kitchen, manger's nephew joins the kitchen crew and they have to whip up a series of wedding dishes by 6pm. 

Started off a little boring but gets increasingly engaging. Loved the last part where they hit drums with puddles of water in it and the water splashes up and woah HOT STUFF! 

No photography/ videography was allowed so here's a picture of us before the show :)

And these are from Google: