So I saw a fucking huge lizard in my room which instantly sparked me to 大扫除 LOL. Seriously I've haven't seen such a huge piece of horror ever since I moved out of hall.

Anw, there's this pile of stuff under my bed that should have been long cleared and I've been nagging at my sister to clear it but she keeeeps on procrastinating zzz. So forget it, I'll clear it.

Turns out 50% of the stuff are mine ahah, and they were mostly just school stuff (notes bibles tbs and shiz), listed some on Carousel LOL

The other 50% were my sister's. And I also realised how much I influenced her :O E.g. the habit of writing, music, creating a 'friend autograph book in pri sch lol

Stumbled upon her diary which I never knew she had. But since its just chucked under my bed, thought it probably isn't anything significant rightttt. So I opened it. And it was as if that book opened up another side of her I never knew existed. That fragility...

It spoke of her relationship with her ex. Aish, shall not dwell into details but it stirred memories of that sharpened sensitivity I once had. Ah wellz, at the end of the day I guess what we want is more or less similar ah.

For that someone who will treat us right, who is sensitive to our feelings, who pushes us to become a better person yknow and be that mutual source of support. Someone who will be there, who knows us. And all that sacrifices we'd be magically willing to take

Okok, anyhow it was just one post that she wrote. Idk why she didn't continue. And I'm gonna continue the packing now huehue T_T

Yknow your period's coming when you start to feel so sian even the fairy lights don't cheer me up now. 

Be an aspirational women. Someone who has overcame hardships, who has got a story to tell. Someone worthy.

Disappeared from this space for quite awhile. So much (life changing events) had been happening the past month. Didn't have much time for myself, to recollect my thoughts. But given a choice, I would totally have erased June 2016 from my life.

Prolly the month that I felt the most empty. Not empty in the sense that someone had left my life kinda empty but more like I lost myself kind of empty. Yknow? Doing radically different things, felt as if I became a totally new person. How should I put it. Like a hermit crab changing shells? Fug.  Didn't even recognise myself. I don't like it. I need a root.

Had a meeting w my M+1 just now and he gave Zhin and I a quick induction about the brand strategy. Was talking about how they only engaged 'self fulfilled' women as endorsers. And yknow they'd check if she's got a story to tell etc, whether she has went through hardships and overcame them and YES all of a sudden it was like a mini throwback moment.

And just now I was on the bus watching a youtube vid called "The Girl Who Changed Me" by Jinnyboy TV and it rlly just..... I guess I found my answer. It was because I kept trying to fit in different shoes that I lost myself, that I didn't know who I was anymore.

Combine the 2 happenings together.
Voila a recipe of nourishment for the soul. Gonna relive the days when I was feeling charged everyday. And this is gon be the toughest challenge yet since its rlly like the toughest period of my life now with my skin becoming super sensitive like tofu but hey the tougher the challenge, the greater the fulfilment right ;) So YEAH here's to finding myself again, never losing hope and appreciating the simple simple SIMPLE things in life when things get better! And I strongly believe it will cos winter will always turn to spring :)